Homemaker CEOGrowing Spiritually, Personally, and Professionally

I Scream, You Scream, We all Scream

“Shut the door!”, “Give her back her toy!”, “I told you to stop playing and to sit down!” These are all common screams our children often receive from their parents; yes, even Christian parents.

Fact is, there is a universal plague of screaming abilities parents often have but it is defective. God didn’t intend for us to yell at our children every time they annoy us with their whining or lack of obedience. Yet a large percentage of parents do this daily and even several times a day.

So many parents suffer from guilt and shame that they so easily loose control. Recently a mother reported that she felt like horrible parents because she yells at her girls and other mom’s, specifically Christian’s do not. It was a delight to enlighten her! Another reported she enjoyed the relief it provided for her.

Either of these responses can become unhealthy. Is it best that we not yell at our kids? Of course! And keeping control of our own emotions enables them to learn the ropes for dealing with those who will push their buttons too. Obviously, self-control is really put to the test in our character when dealing with screaming but it is something we can learn to deal with.

For one, talk to your spouse or someone who is around you most of the time about your desire to stop screaming. Let them know it is not a response you are proud of and are willing to take steps to stop that behavior.

Thought it may not be easy, ask your spouse or support partner to give you a signal reminding you of your new commitment when you are in the middle of a screaming moment. No, you may not take it personal if they have to do it often. When you really want to stop a behavior, accountability is a must.

Commit to yourself that you will stop right in the middle of a sentence if you realize you are screaming and step away from the room or situation. Self-control is often accomplished by our own will, desire, and determination to cease taking part in unhealthy choices.

Fourthly, apologize to your kids if they are old enough to understand it. Inform them that you do not like yelling at them and would like to stop even though it is hard.

Finally, ask the Lord to give you the strength and grace to accomplish this which pleases Him. If you fail, it is OK, start over. Once you feel you have done all you can do to control this and it has not ceased, seek counseling.

Teresa G. Lusk is the author of Good Enough to be a Homemaker and CEO, a Motivational Speaker and founder of the non-profit organization, Homemaker CEO. Teresa has a Bachelor of Science in Psychology, Religion, and Christian Counseling. www.teresalusk.com or www.homemakerceo.com

My husband and I did not grow up in a Christian home; therefore, since we came to the Lord in 2003, we have made it a point to raise our children with God’s Word. Literally, this is part of our daily nutritional value and daily bread.

What this has looked like for years now is providing our children a foundation that says nothing can be done successfully without taking God’s Word into our life every single day. It is not just a Sunday meal.

Will our oldest child practice this as he gets older? What about the younger ones? We will leave that in God’s hands and be encouraged in His word as I heard Pastor Charles Stanley remind us that if we pray for something, and it is within the will of God, so it shall be done (1 John 5:14-15). I know for a fact, that God wants my children and yours to have everlasting life (John 3:16). Therefore, I believe that they too will learn and walk in the responsibility to take a portion of the Word of God into their life every day.

Now, what is an appropriate age to start teaching my children the Word of God, and what stories are best to share with them, you might ask? Well, this past December 2009, we decided to purchase a Tyndale, One Year Bible for our six year old daughter. Sure there was some hesitation about the level, time it would take to read, and the content. After all, the Old Testament does have some violence, incest, drinking, and much more. Yet, that was not enough to keep us from wanting her to explore the greatness of God’s Word. And while we did run into to words and phrases such as “slept together”, and “sex”, my husband in his God given wisdom, replied to my daughter’s question of “ what is sex?” as “it is like kissing but a little more”. Believe it or not, she did not push for more. Why? Most likely because her mind and knowledge of that topic is not developed enough.

God’s Word does have some mature related content, yet that is not enough for us as parents to keep them from digging into the great historical and Biblical messages God has your child. If your child, like ours, has surpassed the toddler stage stories and often visited ones like “David and Goliath”, and you believe your child is ready for more, then dig in, and give them what God has put in their heart to desire, His Word.

Use your wisdom when running into questions that demand simple answers but don’t deprive their right to begin walking in the knowledge of God’s power.

Teresa G. Lusk, is the author of Good Enough to be a Homemaker and CEO, a motivational speaker, and founder of the non-profit organization, Homemaker CEO. Teresa has a Bachelor of Science in Psychology, Religion, and Christian Counseling. www.teresalusk.com or www.homemakerceo.com.